I've seen some people talking about the "No Code of Conduct". That the "internet is a big place, you should prepare yourself to deal with it."

It looks ~cool~, but there's a big problem: it put the burden on the victims of the harassment.

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So for people who are constant target of attacks and are already in a fragile state, you shouldn't say that they need to "learn to deal with the internet".

No, we should stop the assholes from harassing other people in the first place. The burden must be on the attacker.

Why is it such a big problem to state that we don't want those assholes hanging around?

They should be the ones to learn how to interact with other human beings politely.

The internet is a big place. Learn to treat other people with respect and politeness.

@vnen I agree in principle, but you have to start on the premise and the assumption that no one will be there to protect you - which means teaching people to defend themselves and respond appropriately with the block and report button/tools available on each platform and venue.

You have to teach people how to defend themselves until help arrives (without shooting off firearms, I mean :) ) And that includes running and getting help as well (reporting and blocking etc..).

@natharari I agree that people should learn how to defend themselves, it's a survival skill. But it's more important that people learn how to behave.

Creating a CoC is giving tools for people to defend themselves.

@vnen I would say that the two are just as important. We can't have one without the other. We have to build societies which include both equally (the lesson on how to behave and the lesson on how to react to bad behavior and get help) for any of it to work. A society is made up of the sum of its parts - people. And that means each person is just as important in their reaction to the threat. So each person is there to defend the society and defend others as well as themselves.

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